The month of April always, by sheer nature, starts out on a bad foot. With every publication trying to get the one-two punch in with the most self-aggrandizing April Fools' jokes, it is always bound to be a doozy of a thirty days, and the sooner it's over, the motherfugging better. In this year of 2013's April, we tricked you into thinking that Coachella had become a 365 day affair, which, by our last count, could really actually be true. FACT Mag was on target with their mysterious Boards of Canada trick, while BuzzFeed did the good-natured and very necessary act of rounding up all the jokes into one post, The Top Ten Best April Fools Jokes on the Internet in 2013. Actually, we didn't check that, but that's probably true, right?
The worst part about this past April, though, has to be that most of the things that happened in pop culture this month felt like jokes, but weren't. On more than one occasion, we had to question the veracity of a story posted, thinking “WHO IS PUNKING US?” and “WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?” This was the month of Ashton Kutcher's Revenge, and it was swift, hard, and probably boning your mother right now.
Danny Brown's on-stage fellatio in Minnesota, ODB Wants His Shtick Back (Myspace Tom's Records)
LL Cool J & Brad Paisley, “Accidental Racist” b/w “Accidental Racist (Publicity Ploy Remix)” 7-inch (Def Jam Nashville)
Neutral Milk Hotel reunion, Support My Child's College Fund feat. Washed Out (Epitaph Records)
Spin Standoff, No We're Not Tweeting on Day of National Tragedy, but Here Look at This Thinkpiece on Hip Hop (SE-OWNED Records)
Boards of Canada, The Matrix Wasn't Just A Movie and eBay Isn't Just for Knockoff Ray-Bans (Superfan Press)
Daft Punk and The Creators Project and Pharrell and Nile Rodgers, So Help Me God If I Have to See That Helmet Image One More Time (Les Miserables Soundtrack)
Amanda Palm…, WHAT? WE COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF AMANDA PALMER'S CROWD-SOURCED CIRCLE JERK feat. Morrissey (Your Wallet)
Vampire Weekend and Nucky Thompson, AmEx Presents Unnecessary: Old Dudes Getting Paid to Have Young Dudes Get Paid to Make You Get a Credit Card feat. Grimes (Your Wallet, again)
Tyler, The Creator vs. Mountain Dew, So You're Telling Me That Odd Future Made a Racist Commercial (Williams Street Records)