Drake,”Best I Ever Had”

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The moment we've been waiting for as a rap-listening people! Drake, the man with the biggest buzz since Kanye, has finally made a video for his mixtape track, “Best I Ever Had”, and it's directed by… Kanye! The guy only released a mixtape and he has Kanye doing a video, Consequence and Fabolous in the video, and the hottest song of the last two quarters. Time to put this gold in the bank!

Woof. Horrible and disaster are two words that come to mind. What does coaching a girls' high school basket team have to do with this song? And since when did Kanye resort to so much slow motion boob footage? Not that we have a problem with it, but isn't this a song that women have kind of claimed as their power ballad (even though it is still an incredibly sexist song)?

I will say this: I thought Drake was pretty good in the video. He used to be an actor, so I think it was a good move to have him saying some lines in there. (“Take that, D!”) Fundamentally though, this video is about Kanye West being a horny, if not sort of pervy man. No surprise there; the dude's already admitted to being a huge porno nut. Just too bad for Drake that Kanye had to get that expression out on his video. And isn't this just “Workout Plan” all over again?

On the bright side, this video is a unifier for America. Much like 9/11 when everyone was a little nicer to each other, this video invokes a post-tragic emotion where we will all understand that anyone we know could have made a better, more relevant video for this song. Say goodbye to gang violence after this video makes it on MTV. Watch the national divorce rate drop to zilch after couples view this video together. Now for a collective thank you to Kanye.

And after that, never watch this video ever again and download the amazing So Far Gone Drake mixtape instead to see what all the hype is really about.